Welcome to The Maroon Observer, a weekly newsletter about rugby league, Queensland and rugby league in Queensland.
Around the grounds
Cowboys (M) 38 defeated Storm 30. We won’t take too much out of this game. For example, we won't focus on the Cowboys missing two dozen tackles and giving up 30 points to the North Sydney-Sunshine Coast FalconBears or how bad Jeremiah Nanai is. At least the crowd was big and Kyle Feldt had fun. I think Todd Payten has stopped caring: ‘I’ve tried teaching defence and you just won't listen. So whatever, do you whatever you like.’ They’re going to finish 15-9 and miss the prelims. I’m sick of looking at Alec McDonald.
More:
Bulldogs versus Sea Eagles. The score and result are not relevant here because this was THE BIGGEST GAME EVER*.
*In the 6pm Friday slot**
**Played in Sydney
*Or between these two teams
Outside of Major League Baseball, no one loves an overqualified statistic like Sydney rugby league people try to justify their crowds, e.g. the Roosters have the highest attendance (in Sydney) and (because the NSW government bought them a new stadium).
Proposal to institute the Gold Coast Line, where if your Sydney club can’t pull the same or better crowds than the Gold Coast Titans, your NRL licence is forfeit. Let’s clean this joint up a bit before the new teams get here.
Sharks 22 defeated Titans (W) 6. Seems pretty simple that not only did the heat - a recurring theme in a lot of games watched by The Maroon Observer this weekend - have a negative impact on the Titans - I’ve never seen so many players so red in the face, even with the weird colour mix used by Nine - but they were beaten by a better team. The Sharks made far fewer errors, generated an extra 600m, won the linebreaks 8-1 and missed half as many tackles. The Sharks were balanced, efficient and composed.
Notwithstanding all of that, the Titans have an issue (among others) at 6. Every fifth tackle goes through the hands of Lauren Brown, which makes for predictability and the knowledge that if pressure can be applied to Brown, her kicking may suffer and the Titans have no other options. It is unfortuante that Fuimaono is suspended and Kiria-Ratu and Lofipo were both injured. I didn’t think Lailani Montogomery had the best debut but these are extenuating circumstances. At 3-3, with the Eels, Knights and Raiders left on the schedule, Gold Coast need to find some answers if they’re to make the finals, never mind the premiership.
Pride 38 defeated Falcons 0. The Cowboys’ B-team was probably never going to lose Sunshine Coast A-grade’s finest. The Pride severely outclassed the Falcons through the first half, even while struggling to execute while almost on top of the line, which would have made the score even more embarrassing. The Falcons did not cope with the heat in Cairns and barely troubled Northern in their rare instances of getting the ball in decent field position.
Eels (M) 44 defeated Dragons 40. The highest losing score ever. No asterisks needed, not even to include the 1909-87 BRL, because the St George Illawarra Dragons are a special and unique snowflake of ineptitude. The basement of Caxton Street Brewing Co couldn't have cared less about this game when the Eels were up 26 but every eye in the house found a screen for the last five minutes. Hard to tell if the vibe was in favour of the Eels winning to help both teams’ finals chances or the Dragons comeback for the chaos. Possibly both.
This enormous weekend of football continues below the fold.
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Around the grounds (continued)
Hunters 23 defeated Seagulls 8. We’ll probably call this the Joshua Lau game. The head geared five-eighth played a key role in several tries and popped off the field goal of disrespect in the final minutes to seal a big win over Wynnum. The Seagulls started strong, scoring the first try but the jig was up when they took the two less than 20 minutes into the contest. From there, it was all Hunters as they punched holes in Wynnum’s defence to take their first finals victory since the 2017 grand final in front of a big home crowd.
Dolphins 40 defeated Broncos (M) 6. Well then. I’ve already written enough about this game: Conflict on Caxton III and the August edition of The Pony Picayune.
Capras 32 defeated Bears 24. This was the closest QCup final of the weekend and while the scoreboard tells you one thing, reality on the pitch was another. Burleigh strung together a series of tries early in the second half to close the gap but failed to go on with it. The Capras responded and put the game out of reach. The Bears seemed to struggle to contain the Capras’ moving the ball down field and their fairly conventional, dare I say workmanlike, attacking shape to get the ball into the hands of Bob Tenza. This win avenges last year’s 38-12 finals defeat.
Worth noting that all three of the Broncos’ feeders have been knocked out of the QCup. All three of the Dolphins’ feeders are still alive. These problems run deep.
Broncos (W) 38 defeated Cowboys 12. Everyone who played in and attended this game deserves a medal for braving what I believe was temperatures of 6000K at Langlands. It's bad enough that we’re giving these women brain damage for our entertainment, does the NRL's weenie scheduling strategy really need to add heat stroke? Some people want the NRLW season to start in mid-February, as if smoke inhalation should be added to their list of maladies.
The scoreline doesn’t flatter the Cowboys but isn’t reflective of the performance put in at least the first half, which was both gruelling and gripping. The game got away from North Queensland late, as it did from the Tigers against the Broncos last week, but the signs are still encouraging that the program’s direction is generally, if not consistently, upwards. The Cowboys got beaten through the middle but Jasmine Peters and Jakiya Whitfield had some nice moments in the backs. I’m wondering if Polata’s transition to second row has worked but she seems unable to put together the minutes without injury to allow us a decent sample size. Perhaps there’s a clue there.
Devils 46 defeated Dolphins 18. The Devils outlasted the big Dolphins boys on a hot afternoon in The Nundahdrome Swamp. It was end-to-end stuff until Redcliffe forgot about their end and Norths ran away with it. The 2.Phins were competitive early but ran out of steam and let their frustrations get the better of them. A victory for the slightly littler men.
Knights 36 defeated Titans (M) 14.
Stick to your day job
Every now and again, I get it into my head to do some “journalism” and send some emails to get answers to questions I have. I never quite get around to it because most of my day job is sending emails and actioning the <10% that were worth reading in the first instance. I have had two questions in my head in recent weeks and just by being patient, I can re-report the answers without having had to do anything.
The trial of the century reaches settlement:
Rugby league will avoid the most explosive legal battle since the Super League war with the Queensland Rugby League set to shake hands with the NRL on a $100 million bonanza - the biggest funding deal in their history…
The new deal will tip at least $25 million annually into the QRL’s coffers, funds Hatcher says can help rugby league combat the AFL’s incursion as he called for the NRL to add a new franchise in the west.
My god. That’s so much money. That’s literally insane. It’s malpractice. Every leagues club in the state is going to be made of solid gold and fitted with champagne jacuzzis.
Wait.
Waittt…
Waaaaittttt…
Better cancel those foie gras and caviar orders, folks. I’ve been done in by the tricksy Stinky Pete.
It took me nearly 24 hours to work out what the deal actually was. In the last NRL annual report, funding to states was $42.958 million. Assuming a roughly equal split, that’s $21.5m to the QRL. The “$100 million bonanza” divided by four is $25 million, which is not additional to the existing funding but an increase of $3.5 million per year. I guess $14 million for four years isn’t enough of a BOMBSHELL.
Whether that’s a good deal for the QRL, I’ll state the facts. An extra $3.5 million is an increase of 16% in annual funding from 2023. Based on my estimates, the states split $56 million in inflation-adjusted dollars in 2019, so this increase is still 11% less than Greenberg offered. The new BOMBSHELL does not provide anything for the previously identified $45 million shortfall in funding over the last three reporting cycles.
We don’t know how expensive going to court would have been or how strong the QRL’s case was. The pap from the outgoing chairman about expansion teams is discouraging. Any new NRL franchise should be self-sufficient between NRL central funding (i.e. irrelevant to the QRL’s funding) and the financial support of their fans, presuming there are any. That money really should be going to the community game or at least making Qplus better.
We are free, of course, to chalk this up as another PVL CAPITULATION.
The Jets' NRL bid team have secured $40 million in funding and are hopeful of entering an expanded NRL competition by 2028, with Wayne Bennett as head coach if he is still keen to continue his stellar career.
The partnership between the former Brisbane Jets' NRL bid and foundation premiership club Newtown Jets would be based west of Brisbane in Ipswich, if given a licence by the ARL Commission…
The Jets have received a $40 million commitment by three levels of government to upgrade North Ipswich Reserve and establish a centre of excellence…
AAP has been told the Newtown Jets would be co-owners of the club…
Jets NRL bid chairman Steve Johnson, also the Ipswich Jets boss, has signed a non-disclosure agreement with the NRL. Johnson is chairman of Ipswich Group Ltd, which has put in the bid, and cannot make public comment.
Sound the Scott Sattler klaxon. Sattler, the former Gold Coast Seagull, South Queensland Crusher and Gold Coast Charger, is always good to be on the board of a prospective Brisbane-based NRL club but I can’t help but think that his emergence here is a bad sign for the Easts Tigers, who seem unable to get any momentum since Shane Richardson left for the Wests Tigers. Maybe Coorparoo can make enquiries about a JV with Balmain. Maybe they’re just not that fussed anymore, having been scared off by too many FAITS ACCOMPLIS. Having two bids targetting roughly the same patch of south-east Queensland seems counterproductive but the Jets would be the more endemic, but less well-off (?), choice.
The redevelopment of North Ipswich Reserve is a vital piece of the puzzle, which until this reporting had been unfunded as far as I was aware. Quite where everyone is going to find $40 million for a stadium that will not be used in the Olympics is a mystery but whatever. With most home games to be played at Suncorp, which is on the Ipswich rail line, $40m might be enough for a replica of Dolphins Oval, which I imagine will be a boon for the QCup team, provide a useful community facility and would put the Jets ahead of the 4,000ish capacity at the redeveloped Langlands in terms of infrastructure.
Building stuff ain’t getting any cheaper, so getting started sooner rather than later would be better. The acutal dollars will probably hinge on the outcome of the expansion process, which I would give extremely long odds to the Jets succeeding, and the state government election later this year. Ipswich is not exactly LNP heartland.
If they could promise a F/A-18F flyover for every home game, I would push the Jets in front of the Western Bears and probably the Broncos.
Intermission
Valynce Te Whare and potential star Manase Kaho got all of one-fifth of a round after Harrison Graham got a little hot and bothered late in the game.
Yo, Annetta Nu’uausala is back.
Upcoming Slate
NRLM - Tigers vs Eels in Pootown, Friday 6pm
Put the kids to bed early because it’s SPOON BOWL time. Let’s see if the Tigers can score 42+ and still lose. We can laugh either way. Tip: Eels
NRLW - Cowboys vs Tigers at QCB, Saturday 11am
The Tigers are currently winless. North Queensland are not hopeless like last year and in fact are good (not great). This is one of the games they should have circled as winnable. Kirra Dibb to kick the Tigers to death. Tip: Cowboys
QRLM - Dolphins vs Capras at Kayo, Saturday 2.10pm
After being dispatched by the Devils, Redcliffe jump from one Dolphins Derby to another against Central Queensland. I was prepared to open this by describing how long it’s been since the Capras beat the Dolphins, but it’s already happened twice this year. Before that? 2013. Consider that and also that Redcliffe looked like they really ran out of steam last Sunday. A bit of competence and starch to resist the big boys is all that’s required, both of which are Central’s trade. Tip: Capras
NRLM - Bulldogs vs Cowboys in Pootown, Saturday 5.30pm
This isn’t really for anything, particularly in the extremely likely event of Manly losing, so wouldn’t be too surprising to see some resting happening. Currently, both teams are lined-up at close to full strength, bar the Bulldogs’ halves situation, which is decidedly NSW Cup. Perhaps both sides are looking for a pre-finals tune-up? If Manly do win, we’ll probably see a replay of this the following week and we all know how that goes. Tip: Bulldogs
NRLW - Eels vs Titans at something called “Eric Tweedale Stadium”, Sunday 1.45pm
The Eels’ hot streak has come to an end and they weren’t expected to be much to begin with. The Titans desperately need this win. They have the capability and aren’t usually the kind of side that gets in their own way. Hopefully, Sienna Lofipo plays this week after I made a big deal of it last week and she was ruled out late with a training injury and provides some buffer to Brown. It’s a simple assembly job for Gold Coast: just put it together. Tip: Titans
QRLM - Falcons vs Hunters at Sunshine Coast Stadium, Sunday 2.10pm
The last game at the current Sunshine Coast Stadium before it undergoes Olympic preparations is a replay of the 2017 grand final and it’s only been six weeks since the last one. That afternoon, the Falcons destroyed the Hunters, 66-8. While that was a weird standalone match on what was supposed to be a bye weekend, this is a final and I would like to think the Hunters will come with a bit more hutzpah. If they do, I think that will be enough. The Falcons looked weak last week and the Storm have done them no favours this week, even though Melbourne are more or less going full bore into the skulls of what’s left of the Broncos. Tip: Hunters
NRLM - Knights vs Dolphins in Newcastle, Sunday 4pm
Win and in, it’s probably going to be that simple. Irrespective of the outcome of Raiders-Dragons, both teams’ points differences are horrendous, effectively eliminating them from the race (provided things don’t get out of hand in both games, which you can’t be sure with the Raiders). There’s a real risk the Dolphins put all their eggs in the fuck-the-Broncos basket last week and may play this one flat, like they did earlier in the year. I would’ve thought that making the finals for the first time ever would have been sufficient motivation but I’ve seen that logic fall flat too many times this year. Still, it’s the friggin Knights. Tip: Dolphins
NRLW - Knights vs Broncos in Newcastle, Sunday 6.10pm
I haven’t had a good look at the Knights in a few weeks. My sense is that they are gettable but still good and appear to be at full strength. Expecting something of a classic rugby league game to unfold, with the packs getting into the trenches to decide the winner and the class of the backs to decide by how much. Prefer the Broncos’ 2-5 but Tamika Upton is better than all of them put together. Would put good money on there being a scuffle or fracas or melee during this match, maybe because some of the protagonists in this tiff from earlier in the year are named to start. Tip: Broncos
(Tips 39 / 78)
Notes
Stats: Tedesco or Hughes? Predicting the 2024 Dally M leaderboard by statistics and Does anyone want to win the 2024 NRL title?
Proof that the NRL doesn't have enough talent for further expansion
RLW: How the Dolphins broke the Broncos down, Ponga in the middle & Johnson’s last pass
Cowboys: Cotter extends for three and wins a fatherhood award? Cowboys sack assistant coach Maloney after DUI charge (I’d forgotten he was even there)
Dolphins: Kaufusi CLEARED
Broncos: Staggs and Piakura hurt, Haas to have surgery and Walsh out and “He will remain the coach”, which is true by definition until he gets fired.
Titans: Fifita and Sami will both go under the knife and Titans extend Ipswich Jets partnership to '26. Not clear what this means for the Jets’ Roosters pathway agreement given that was all engineered by Ben Cross, who is no longer at the club.
One of the all-time great rugby league stories: ‘We’ve lost faith in them’: Balmain consider shock exit from Wests Tigers merger and ‘Incompetent, Machiavellian, tin pots’: The explosive emails at heart of Tigers-Magpies feud. Not a good look for anyone, least of Chammas who might have quoted a man on his deathbed and perfectly timed his knife twists for maximum embarrassment. The stakes in this seem so, so low (board positions and report recommendation implementations) and Balmain have such little leverage, it seems hard to believe this won’t fizzle into nothing but that just makes it crazier. Who are these people and where is their grip on reality?
Make Parra Great Again? Greats backing plot to overthrow Eels higher-ups. The framing on this story is gross, as if Donald Trump is a kooky reality TV star with a catchphrase and not courting the weirdest couch fuckers in America to actively undermine democracy simply because he can. Then again, expecting something approaching an understanding of how the real world functions from a rugby league reporter is like expecting a dog to do calculus.
The Eels are in a spoon battle, will take on James Hardie as a major sponsor next year and the board is currently being undermined by a bunch of QAnon fash-adjacent meatheads, including obnoxiously loudly dumbass anti-vaxxer Eric Grothe Jr. The Dragons scored 40 and lost, stood by Jack de Belin and their fans cheered his return to the field, their now-former chairman wrote a letter on Dragons letterhead supporting Brett Finch and don’t forget the covid BBQ and Paul Vaughan hiding under bed from the cops. The Roosters opened their season with a player copping an eight game suspension for being racist, another copped four games for an attempted decapitation, got hosed by David Fifita, regularly lose multiple players per game to ACL snaps and Robinson whines in every press conference. And people have the gall to say the Broncos are evil for merely being owned by Rupert Murdoch!
Slater warns against NYC return. I support his ‘bringing back the NYC will have unintended consequences on player welfare’ policy but I don’t support his ‘losing Origin series through poor decision-making’ policy. Tough one.
Not rugby league but interesting to see what changes are happening elsewhere: The Minor League Shrink And The Growing Gap Between Triple-A And The Bigs
Nickelware
With all of the derby games played, the Titans stand alone at the top of Queensland. Congratulations to the people of the Gold Coast. Undoubtedly, this nickelware will mean a lot to you in lieu of something more substantial and silvery.
Mathematically, a big win for the Broncos over the Storm and a big loss for the Dolphins from the Knights could change second and third placings but that seems extremely unlikely, so we can effectively call this one done.
And for the sickos:
We’ll finalise the affiliate and pyramid premierships next week.
Sound on
A good point, well made
